REALITY Vs FALSE EXPECTATIONS: MOVIES TAKE YOU TO A FAIRY-TALE LAND
While you’re still waiting for your Raj (From DDLJ) or Kabir (From YJHD), there lies a stark reality ahead of you- a reality that most of us ignore because we are so flabbergasted or rather carried away by the fake world of movies. That very person in our life who we so conveniently take up to be ‘Mr. Right’ or assume to be ‘The Perfect One’ might just not be the right choice. Quite often our favorite movies make us feel that it is this very person who you feel a one-sided connection with is the one you will end up dating, marrying and spend your happily ever after with but this isn’t how the reality operates- you’re trapped in a bubble of farce.
The question is why do we expect a kind and loving treatment from the one we feel fondly about? Why is it that women expect fairy-tales out of life and then end up being emotionally dependent on people around them? A large proportion of credit for this goes to the movies that we watch.
Let’s analyse a few of our all time favorites bit by bit.
Kal- Ho- Na- Ho: With a message of living in the moment, Kal Ho Na brings you the story of how a ‘best friend’ who Naina never felt romantically for, ends up marrying her as she suffers a heartbreak post the demise of the one she loved.
DDLJ: A spoilt and carefree brat called Raj bumps into a fun loving Simran during the latter’s trip with friends across Europe. Raj falls in love with Simran during the course of few days but hesitates to confess. Later when Simran reaches India, she can’t stop but think about Raj. And guess what! Contrary to what never or seldom happens in real life, Simran finds Raj right inside her house, plotting on how to get married to her. is
Yeh Jawani Hai Deewani: A flirt named Bunny who wishes to live by his terms comes across Naina- a totally opposite individual who believes in love and settling down in life. Naina starts feeling strongly for Bunny but then he vanishes for a period as long as 8 years. Again contrary to something that would happen in real life, Bunny returns after 8 years only to fall in love with Naina who had been in love with him all this while.
LIVING IN CONSTANT DENIAL- STOP IGNORING THE POSITIVES
The fact remains that you may or may not find the right one but the constant and overpowering dependence on this one person for your happiness will eventually take a toll on you and drain you of so much that you could otherwise do with the productive mental space.
Once you start living in the mode of constant denial- failing to realise that you are not living in ‘La la land’ or a fairy-tale world, you are only harming yourself- you tend to be emotionally broken, you feel incomplete and lonely most of the times and your wait for the ‘perfect or not-so-perfect’ man never seems to come to an end. You end up being low on self-esteem and tend to be under-confident.
Never run behind someone who doesn’t value you. Anything that you have to put a lot of effort into, is probably not meant to last.
So, if you are waiting for the charming, flirt yet lovable Kabir/Bunny, try putting your thoughts on hold. You are not living in the moment. You can do so much with your life- you can improve the way you feel, inculcate your hobbies, work on building your career, study ahead or rather focus on just travelling- an experience which will lead to self-discovery at multiple levels. Treat yourself, tell yourself that you are worth every penny you earn and spend on yourself. Be a person who is admired and loved by all- and not just by a single person.
As philosophical as it may sound, you are your only well-wisher, well, of course, besides your parents. Anyone who loves you or rather promises to ‘love’ you will do so for his selfish purposes- unless he promises to stay forever. You could either aimlessly wait for him or just let things go with the flow or fate strike by during the process.
Blogurnalism by Naina Sharma 